Romney couldn’t save us, so we didn’t elect him. Fair enough. Newly President again Obama can’t save us either, but we elected him anyway. Didn’t know what else to do with the first 1/4 black U.S. president, I guess. He’s too young to retire and we have to use him for something, right? One deficit reduction came to mind: he could cut back on his green fees…ought to save quite a bit, without raising any taxes. I heard he’s back on the links today. Maybe he’ll start cutting the deficit tomorrow.
See, we need more jobs and the Prez already has all the cooks, caddies and Secret Servicefolk he can use. His plan for job creation by the Secret Service backfired when some Republican journalist (Yes, there is one) heard that the jobs being created were mostly for Latin American working girls. But not to worry, he’ll keep trying!
If you don’t feel saved yet, relax, the Prez has big plans. First, he’s going to take the money away from all the folks who have enough of it to invest in businesses to fulfill his ‘soak the rich’ promise, the one sort of politicians’ promise we can believe… then he’s going to compromise with the Republicans, which is the other sort of promise. He’s cutting tons of government workers too; all those he would have hired to work in the 1.6 million acres of Federal land his Department of the Interior is now closing tight to prevent drilling. And he’s already cutting military budgets and manpower, bless him.
Government will keep up doing its part; our President’s military cuts aren’t the whole story. President Obama’s talking about a whole new Federal department, a Department of Business. Jobs aplenty, there! And more tax collectors to help pay for them…and while they’re at it, to help collect a new carbon tax that will save the planet and raise the cost of everything, including when you think about it, free air.
So you needn’t worry about being saved to the point of going out and doing it yourself as your ancestors had to do. That’s so obsolete, like say, going to church or paying your own way. What? Where’s our Prez getting the money to do all he’s promised? C’mon, he’s had no problems with that so far, has he? And anyway, the Federal Reserve can just print him up some more whenever he needs it, right? My daddy used to say money doesn’t grow on trees; I guess he never heard of the Fed, hun?
So relax as your food stamps arrive, we’ve elected the right guy to save us…we don’t have to do anything more…